Two Roads, I Took The One Less Psalty:

When I was growing up my parents didn't go to church all the time.  They went some, especially when I was enrolled at a private Christian school, but church was very early, my people don't do early.  The perk/tragedy of all this would be my extreme lack of any and all knowledge of the 80's Christian children's subculture.  I remember going over to a friends house and my mom half warning and half extolling me to be careful, "they are very religious."  Mom was right, but they were also really nice, so score one for you old Christian neighbors.

I can't remember the name of their son, but he had albino white hair.  It was blindingly blond and curly, so very curly, almost like if the hair kept changing it's mind, "Man, I gotta get away from the scalp!"  but just a few weeks later, "I missed you scalp, I'll never do that again!"  Oh, fickle hair.  He also looked nothing like the Albino in Princess Bride.

So, I'm hanging out with Blondie, and we are shuttled to his room to play.  I'm waiting for the video games, legos, and Ninja Turtles** to get broken out, but that doesn't happen.  We just kind of chilled, he was a big outdoors and sports kid while I was an indoors and imagination kid.  Not saying there isn't overlap, but we had different ideas of what should be happening.  As an olive branch, Blondie asked me if I wanted to listen to music.  I said, "sure".

He pops in a tape and a choir of children singing saccharine sweet tunes about church and trusting God bursts from the speakers, it freaked me out a little.  I asked, "Blondie....what is this?"  to which he replied "Charlie the Church Mouse."  I told him, "Never heard this before."  Blondie was having a hard time processing what it meant that my parents didn't love me enough to introduce me to Charlie.  "You've never heard of Charlie the Church Mouse?"  he asked, "No...but I really like this."  (So you know, I went on a search for Charlie online.  I had remembered the mouse being named Churchy.  Google is leading me to believe I was wrong.)

I in fact did not like "this".  I thought it was dumb.  I also thought that sitting and listening to a full two sided tape of Charlie's adventures would be miserable so I took one for the team and offered to go get embarrassed at basketball.  That was pretty much my one and only experience with Christian children's media till Veggietales came on the scene 10 years ago, which I was thankfully saved near there and was gracious towards the new generation of "Church Mice".  Also, Charlie with a Jetpack.

My wife on the other hand....she grew up with the stuff.  She and her sisters would watch videos and memorize songs.  They would pick characters out and mimic the part while dancing along with them.  Some of her fondest memories are formed around watching something called "Psalty the Singing Songbook."  I was introduced to Psalty last night as my wife broke out in song and dance in our bathroom.  Fun side note, I think you'll see that Psalty's career didn't end.  He just took of the costume and became Flabber from Big Bad Beetleborgs.  (Trust me...you'll see it in the videos.)


I didn't believe a word of the story she was telling me about Psalty and his adventures.  I certainly didn't believe that this was a live action show either.  So, where do I head?  Youtube, that's where.  I found this.  Take the jump and get ready for a trip down memory lane or a quick fill up for your nightmare fuel tank.



 

I dunno, the dog freaks me out.




This is the one that my wife remembered. I love that this video is it's own ironic statement about the Christian subculture. Also, the dog freaks me out.







**I don't want anyone to think I'm against men and women playing the part of anthropomorphic animals or books in Psalty's case.  The TMNT 'Coming Out Of Their Shells Tour Live" tape got worn out in my Walkman.  I know that might be the secular version of Churchy and Psalty, but me and the turtles...we both loved Pizza.